{"id":9929,"date":"2015-10-29T15:12:10","date_gmt":"2015-10-29T22:12:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/foundersnetwork.com\/?p=9929"},"modified":"2026-04-15T17:39:45","modified_gmt":"2026-04-16T00:39:45","slug":"managing-founder-stress","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/foundersnetwork.com\/managing-founder-stress\/","title":{"rendered":"How founders level up without burning out"},"content":{"rendered":"

Founders transition from makers \u2013 the mad inventors chasing a crazy idea \u2013 to leaders tasked with growing the momentum of a team of investors and collaborators. But as later-stage founders look to level up and grow beyond an operational maker to a true leader, they have to fill in the rough edges on their own. Burnout has many interpretations in the tech community, and it\u2019s something of a taboo to talk about \u2013 if you can\u2019t take the heat, the culture goes, you don\u2019t belong in the foundry.<\/span><\/p>\n

The conversation about burnout goes beyond stress and breaking points, to more nuanced business questions of sustainability and maturity. At the recent founder-centric “fnSummit” in Napa Valley, Founders Network members weighed how becoming a better leader involves rejecting some of the \u201cjust try harder\u201d myths of Silicon Valley culture, and thinking through living the 24-hour startup life in a way that leaves you able to nurture not just this company, but the next one and the one after that.<\/span><\/p>\n

They offered four lessons in “founderhood” that scale from a company\u2019s first days to riding out an IPO.<\/span><\/p>\n

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  1. Young founders usually work in a tech monoculture \u2013 but mature leaders look further for challenging (and balancing) points of view<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n
  2. External expectations don\u2019t reflect what\u2019s best for you \u2013 OR for your company<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n
  3. It doesn\u2019t get any easier, but that\u2019s not bad news<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n
  4. Avoiding burnout requires doing what you already know you should<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Young founders usually work in a tech monoculture \u2013 but mature leaders look further for challenging (and balancing) points of view<\/b><\/p>\n

    Before he founded Mucker Capital, William Hsu followed the storybook founders path, starting a company at age 22 and figuring out how to become an adult at the same time he learned to raise $50 million and grow to over 250 employees. <\/span><\/p>\n

    \u201cIt\u2019s as if I was a \u2018genius\u2019 but didn\u2019t learn algebra or addition or subtraction \u2013 I went straight to calculus,\u201d Hsu says. Founders often start businesses long before they\u2019ve worked their way through different roles in a corporate life cycle \u2013 sometimes before they\u2019ve even logged much experience working, period. That means that a few years in, they\u2019ve picked up many of the rules of the game, but not necessarily in a guided way.<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u201cI eventually figured out what I needed to, but I had to reinvent the wheel every single time,\u201d Hsu says. He values the idea of \u201cimpatience\u201d with one\u2019s career – an open and directed search to seek out experiences that challenge what you think you know about business. <\/span>\u201cBe blunt and critical about what you don\u2019t know, and be very open and directed about getting those experiences,\u201d he says. \u201cThat doesn\u2019t necessarily mean going to work at Google \u2013 if your network is robust, like with Founders Network, what you need to do is take time out from the business day-to-day to actually talk to your peers, other entrepreneurs who\u2019ve made it. <\/span>Carve out time to learn, even while you are learning a business.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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    What you need to do is take time out from the business day-to-day to actually talk to your peers, other entrepreneurs who\u2019ve made it<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

    That learning requires looking beyond immediate peers to a more diverse cohort. Helge Hellberg sees a pervading assumption of \u201cmasculine\u201d culture in tech. <\/span>As founder of Organic Media Network, which has grown to reach 10 million users, he has <\/span>seen a prevailing assumption among entrepreneurs that when things get tough, you should get even tougher – doubling down rather than taking a step back. <\/span>\u201cInstead of allowing space for creativity and nurturing \u2013 which is what\u2019s mostly needed \u2013 we tend to do the opposite, and work harder,\u201d he says. <\/span>It should be obvious: if the way you\u2019re living as a founder isn\u2019t working now, why not assess what you can change? But that requires a departure from the \u201cwork more, work harder\u201d culture.<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u201cI can guarantee you will be a kinder person in the world \u2013 somebody who really takes care of themselves is usually not an asshole at large. <\/span>And that\u2019s good for your company, not just for you,” Hellberg says.<\/span><\/p>\n

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    Somebody who really takes care of themselves is usually not an asshole at large. And that\u2019s good for your company, not just for you.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

    External expectations don\u2019t reflect what\u2019s best for you \u2013 OR for your company<\/b><\/p>\n

    There\u2019s a myth in the valley \u2013 or motto \u2013 that if you don\u2019t kill yourself working, you\u2019re not fully committed as a leader. <\/span>\u201cI see people so burnt out that all they know is how to run their companies, not even the basics of healthy living or taking care of yourself,\u201d Hellberg says. <\/span>Buying into that narrative doesn\u2019t last, according to the founders and investors in Founders Network who\u2019ve been around long enough to see what it takes to survive not just one successful company, but a series of them. <\/span><\/p>\n

    \u201cThere\u2019s this really fundamental belief that if you don\u2019t struggle as an entrepreneur, you\u2019re not in it. If you really need to change something, you\u2019re kind of weak,\u201d Hellberg says. <\/span>\u201cThat mindset is toxic \u2013 that the unsuccessful \u2018gave up\u2019 \u2013 and it\u2019s a voice that echoes through the entrepreneurial area so heavily.\u2019\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

    Struggling at a constant personal breaking point fits the mythos of the unicorn-creator, but it doesn\u2019t define the reality of many \u2013 perhaps even most \u2013 startups that mature into stability with undamaged founders. <\/span>\u201cIf you let the startup get into your veins, it hurts you and your business,\u201d says Ranan Lachman, who\u2019s raised $15 million for his sharing economy startup Pley after life as an investment banker and before that, an Israeli Air Force fighter pilot. <\/span>\u201cIt is for the benefit of the company that you take care of yourself, and you project it in your ability to raise money and to lead your team,\u201d he says. \u201cThey need to look at their leader, the CEO of this company, and see that he\u2019s doing all of this, and still going to the gym! He looks normal.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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    It is for the benefit of the company that you take care of yourself, and you project it in your ability to raise money and to lead your team<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

    It\u2019s good for your company to give some care to yourself \u2013 but many people don\u2019t have an incentive to remind you of that. <\/span>\u201cBeing a CEO is the loneliest job in the world. Nobody is your friend \u2013 when everything goes wrong it\u2019s your fault, and when everything goes right they\u2019re all waiting for you to fail,\u201d Hsu says sympathetically from his new vantage point as investor observing a new generation of founders. <\/span>\u201cTake time to go to that network that is totally outside of your company \u2013 people that don\u2019t report to you, don\u2019t need to listen to you and don\u2019t care about the consequences of telling you that hey, you should be trying something else. Context and perspective is so important as a CEO.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

    It doesn\u2019t get any easier, but that\u2019s not bad news<\/b><\/p>\n

    \u201cI criticize the term work\/life balance, because in today\u2019s world \u2018balance\u2019 suggests that there is a wall between work and life. Unfortunately, as an entrepreneur it\u2019s all together,\u201d Lachman says. When you’re chasing an idea you love, you probably won\u2019t be turning it off at an arbitrary time of night. But that means that a passionate founder has to be very mindful of how she acts out that obsession. <\/span><\/p>\n

    \u201cI have the privilege of taking my work home to my kids and having them be the testers of my product, but that\u2019s a rare kind of project,\u201d Lachman says of Pley, which allows families to subscribe to a monthly delivery of creative toys that are reused over time. Imagine the largest trove of Legos you\u2019ve ever seen. <\/span>\u201cI use my kids and wife to bounce ideas and perfect what we\u2019re doing, but most people cannot combine them. Before you have a good team and your core business running it is very hard to do other things,\u201d he acknowledges. \u201cIt does spread you thin.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

    \u201cThe moment you are an entrepreneur, you basically give up most of your life,\u201d Hellberg says. \u201cThat makes it even more important to look at the quality of that world \u2013 of founderhood. It is not just a job, but that doesn\u2019t change your makeup as a human being. And you\u2019ll pay the bill later [if you don’t have the right foundation].\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

    A<\/span>s a leader of a company, as a leader of a team, being the best version of ourselves means coming from a place of self-sustainability, he says. \u201cEvery VC at the summit said that if your life is stressful, just wait until you get funded – because then it gets really stressful.\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

    But they\u2019re not offering this as bad news \u2013 instead, it\u2019s a call to stop cutting corners. Preferably before you start. <\/span>\u201cMindfulness is not a luxury, it is a foundation,\u201d Hellberg says. \u201cThat means productivity, leadership, how you show up and what you expect of others.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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    Mindfulness is not a luxury, it is a foundation. That means productivity, leadership, how you show up and what you expect of others.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

    The common offenders get rattled off by every entrepreneur listing what they wish they had more of: time for nourishing food and exercise, unplugged moments away from the demands devices carry. And Founders Network\u2019s funded founders will tell you that it doesn\u2019t get easier \u2013 raising $15 million doesn\u2019t actually make you any happier than you were before \u2013 so don\u2019t drop happiness from your list of must-haves. Ever. <\/span><\/p>\n

    \u201cTaking a long-term approach is the huge take-away,\u201d says Kevin Holmes, who started Founders Network in 2011 to create a place for entrepreneurs to share this kind of peer experience. <\/span>\u201cToo often we don’t take care of ourselves until some upcoming milestone like funding is achieved. The focus on fundraising comes at the expense of other areas \u2013 product, recruiting, growth and oneself,\u201d he says. <\/span><\/p>\n

    This seems like it should be obvious advice. It is. But translating it into everyday choices requires more than just discipline (discipline is pretty good to have, too \u2013 Lachman cited the training to withstand torture in the Israeli armed forces as a desirable preparation for enduring the hours and stress of a founder\u2019s lifestyle). <\/span><\/p>\n

    Avoiding burnout requires doing what you already know you should<\/b><\/p>\n

    Founders already know what they should be doing \u2013 and it doesn\u2019t involve chasing a water-boarding lifestyle. <\/span>\u201cIt doesn\u2019t take much to open the door,\u201d Hellberg says. \u201cAll we have to do is a have a little bit of help and assistance and practice.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

    Step one:<\/strong> accept that a good leader manages his life as well as his company. And find the peers who can help you see that in action. That\u2019s part of why Hsu thinks broad networks are important to successful entrepreneurship. <\/span>This isn\u2019t just kumbaya permission to put ‘you first.’ <\/span>\u201cIf you\u2019re totally committed to your company but you miss life, it makes you somewhere, deep down, resentful of the company you\u2019re trying to build,\u201d Hellberg says. \u201cThat does not make you a good leader.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

    Step two:<\/strong> focus on what\u2019s actually working and emulate it from there. <\/span>\u201cThe art, which is not easy, is first of all to put the fundamental things you need in your schedule that destress you,\u201d Lachman says. He <\/span><\/span>works out in the morning, regardless of how his week is shaping up, because he knows he must. As a young founder, Hsu practiced learning to look up and leave his desk even when he was in a terrible mood, and to act like the leader he was trying to learn to be for his team, even if at first it didn\u2019t come naturally. <\/span>\u201cHave a little reminder ring every hour to take a couple of really deep breaths, or take your day back by only doing emails at certain points in the day. Whatever you need to do to get ahold of yourself,\u201d Hellberg says.<\/span><\/p>\n

    “In Founders Network we have a unique opportunity to focus on issues that relate directly to founders vs. their startups \u2013 and sometimes those two are not aligned, or at least not the same. That\u2019s why we have a theme of not just surviving as a founder, but thriving,\u201d Holmes says. He organizes events like the fnSummit because he thinks the stronger relationships formed over a few days in a retreat-like, immersive experience lead to in-depth connections between the personal and the business. That\u2019s means not just more effective sharing of advice and peer support, but also a stronger logic connecting how the personal and business sides of a founder\u2019s life need to align for success in the year ahead.<\/p>\n

    \u201cI\u2019m never a satisfied person \u2013 no matter how well potentially you do, you want to do better,\u201d Lachman says. But that doesn\u2019t mean he feels destined to burn up in pursuit of Pley\u2019s continued success. \u201cYou need to sit with yourself and say, \u2018What is really important to me?\u2019 I\u2019m making sure that I have the time that I feel is right with my kids, and the rest of it goes to my work. Your head is always thinking about the business, and that is something you can\u2019t stop, unfortunately. You have to manage it.\u201d <\/span>In Lachman\u2019s case, that means setting aside his iPhone and putting his children to bed \u2013 but then sometimes working into the night. <\/span>\u201cMy wife always tells me that this is my last startup,\u201d he says ruefully. \u201cBut I can tell that if I had the capacity, I have 5 other ideas that I wish I could have seeded on the side and let them run in parallel.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n